Let's Get A Taste Of The New Tiger

1. You are new to being a full-time Tiger. Everyone hates you already, how will you get us to like you?

I think I’ll just continue to blend in. I’ve got my spot at the end of the bench where I can go in between innings. If someone wants to talk to me I might respond. Otherwise, leave me the F alone.

(Author’s commentary: Don’t worry no one wants to talk to you.)

2. You just got engaged? Why?

Call me old fashioned. Plus, who doesn’t like a good honeymoon.

(Think long and hard about this. Marriage is like getting punched in the bag everyday but less arousing. Just kidding, you're a winner, I'm sure this marriage thing'll work out for you...but seriously, think about it.)

3. What is your greatest BT moment?

Getting the call to come up to the Bayside Tigers full time. Every boys dream. Like pretending to shoot the final bucket in basketball to win the game. BT is a way of life.

(I thought THIS was every boy's dream? Even so it's hard to fault your love for the Tigers. Believe me the feeling is mutual.)

4. Have you been told you look like a skinny UFC Fighter Jon Fitch? No, not even here?


No but I have been told I look like one tough dude.

(But a skinny tough dude, right?)

5. Name two things you consider yourself to be very bad at besides slow-pitch softball and life.

Where do I begin. I would say foreign languages and sitting still.

(Leben Sie einmal, erhalten Sie naß, dann sterben Sie.)

6. You are really fast. If you had to run against Dad in a race around the bases, how many times would you lap him?

All in all I am a nice guy. I would probably only lap him once to prove a point…then on my second lap I would run behind him and cheer him on to the finish. But then I’d probably sprint ahead real quick to lap him twice. I can’t stand odd numbers.

(Green Day told me that nice guys finished last? I dare you to watch this video & avoid motion sickness or at least avoid being annoyed by watching a crappy Green Day video.)

7. Which one of the current or former Tiger’s is your favorite?

The house of glass, OT…..just playin potna. However, he did provide me with the tools to get me my shot at BT. And he is one heck of a model American.

(OT is one hell of a sexy beast. It’s hard to find fault with this choice.)

8. When was the first time you realized you had reached stardom with the BT’s?

I knew I reached stardom when Global launched the other teams softball into the Iowa softball field. At that point, everyone knew the Bayside Tigers.

(Good point we were all infamous from that day on. BTW here is a photo of a young Global praticing his craft.)

9. You rock a pretty consistent 8 o’clock shadow, why not go full bore with it?

Your right, I am quite partial to my facial hair. There is really no rhyme or reason to the "boreness." More lazy. However, Ill probably continue the 8 o’clock shadow and maybe throw in some surprises here and there. If you want to see the beard style of the week, you just have to make it out to a BT game this season.

(That sounds like a weekly challenge. What kind of ridiculous facial hair will Hunnel show up with this week?)

10. If you could choose, how would you want to die?

Getting trapped under a gas truck. Once that thing goes, you don’t feel a thing.

(Yowch!)

Enjoyone from the archives of hip hop history.



Live Once, Get Wet, Then Die,

The Bayside Tigers